“Are you capable of handling this?”
What? Did he just insult my abilities? Does he think I’m some fly-by-night hack? Your fingers start flying as you type your response. Smoke is practically coming from the keyboard.
Of course, there’s another way of interpreting that question – as an honest inquiry. The customer would like to work with you, but has to be sure you can meet his needs. No subtle dig intended.
Email miscommunication = lost sales
You’ve just witnessed a classic email miscommunication. Misinterpreting an email message, particularly when from a customer, can cost you a sale. It’s crucial that you understand how and why these misunderstandings occur so you can do your best to avoid them.
In the age of the Internet, even owners of brick-and-mortar businesses communicate with customers primarily via email. The strength of your personal relationship with that customer depends heavily on the written word.
“A first step toward improving accuracy in emails is to recognize the possibility that we are fallible as both email senders and receivers,” Kristin Byron, assistant professor of management in the Whitman School of Management at Syracuse University, reminds us.
Flaming
In the world of electronic communications, responding with instantaneous anger (with a bit of venom peppered in for good measure) is known as “flaming.” If that potential sale was a building, it’s now burning to the ground.
The fact that this phenomenon has its own name says a lot. Level-headed people, never quick to anger in their daily lives, can get downright mean in no time at all. It shows us that there is, and maybe always will be, a primal, knee-jerk reaction-provoking element in email communication that we need to acknowledge.
The root causes of email miscommunication
- Nonverbal cues, such as facial expressions and body language, are entirely absent from email communications. Yet, those are some of the most important elements of a conversation. Without nonverbal cues to help us interpret the words in front of us, we have to fill in the intended tone for ourselves. Unfortunately, human nature starts to rear its often defensive head and we easily assume the worst.
- Brevity is another problem. People like to keep their emails short and to the point. However, a one or two word response can come across as curt. In our informal, day-to-day email communications we include “emoticons” to clarify our tone and meaning. The typographical smiley face is practically a universally recognizable symbol: We also stick in little stage cues like <grin> to indicate that we’re being friendly and playful. Alas, until Fortune 500 companies pave the way by inserting smiley faces replete with arms, legs and goofy grins into their emails, we’ll have to rely on common sense and careful wording.
- Another issue is the perception that written words are chosen more carefully than spoken ones. But, in common practice, we know that’s not quite accurate. Most of us are email junkies, and we respond to each other’s messages so quickly that it takes on the rate of regular conversation. As a result, we type without thinking, and what we say can come out all wrong.
With speech, we can catch ourselves with a “Whoa…that came out wrong. I’m sorry.” If we’ve said something potentially offensive in an email, we sometimes don’t know it until it’s too late. The big problem? The customer has it down in writing to read over and over again, getting angrier each time.
No more misunderstandings
There are a few simple steps you can follow to reduce the potential for misunderstandings in email conversations. The extra time it takes will be well worth it when you never lose another sale to miscommunication.
1.Reply in complete sentences, and include a salutation and a friendly closing line.
2.Read the email out loud before you send it. “People often think the tone or emotion in their messages is obvious because they ‘hear’ the tone they intend in their head as they write,” says psychologist Nicholas Epley of the University of Chicago.
3.Use descriptive, non-emotional subject lines. An emotional or subjective subject line can set the wrong tone before the email is even read.
4.Never write in all caps – it’s the email equivalent of shouting. In some situations, underlining, bolding or writing in a red font can convey anger, too.
5.Opt for a phone call or face-to-face meeting if you have to touch on issues that are personal or emotional.
Give ‘em the benefit of the doubt
When something a customer says in an email rubs you the wrong way, you have two choices. You can assume the worst and let the flames begin, or you can give the customer the benefit of the doubt. In the vast majority of cases, the writer truly didn’t mean to offend or insult. Let it slide.
Read carefully but not too closely
“How about actually reading my email before you respond!” Infamous last words of a dying customer relationship. We tend to just scan emails, which opens the door for overlooking an important piece of information. Take the time to read every word. When we scan and “fill in the blanks” with assumptions, we risk a breakdown in communication.
Remember, though, you’re walking a thin line. If you scrutinize and overanalyze an email, you can start to read too much into it. Leave the dissection to high school biology students.
In the end, perhaps we’d all do well to remember the wise words of Dr. Laurence J. Peter, educator and founder of the Peter Principle, “Speak when you are angry – and you’ll make the best speech you’ll ever regret.”
